Hello Airports

After having a mild heart attack thinking "I'm going to miss my flight" since stupid New York decides that, instead of having green lights when cars are coming, they choose red when cars are coming so no one can drive anywhere.ever. I have reached my terminal! Now since, yes mom and dad you were right I panic for no reason, I am early I have time to blog, I'm going to chat a little about this airport. So, me being totally deaf and unconscious before 7am and 2 cups of coffee, I go through security and have a necklace on. Guy goes "Can you put that behind your back" me: huh? Guy: "Just swing it behind your back" me: (confused clearly, takes it off and tries to shove it into the non-existant pocket in my yoga pants. molly:0, life: 10) guy: "no, no (clearly thinks im a total idiot at this point) Put it around your neck, now hold the necklace, and put the long section behind your back. Thereee you goo" me: "oh, ha, oops". Okay, besides the fact that I'm delirious, this makes no sense. Anyways, this music playing is making me very uneasy. It sounds like the sinking scene from the Titanic combined with those ballroom scenes in movies where everyone is all happy then people start getting shot. Now it's all frantic. Ugh. Seriously, play some folk or literally anything but classical "you're going to die or have to run really fast through your next airport and we are preparing you for that turmoil" music. If I have to run through Seattle, they better play "Run Run Rudolph" so I at least can laugh about it from the Home Alone refence- probably has a 0% chance of happening.  Also (random)- Starbucks, can't you just purchase a damn toaster? Who wants to munch on a bagel without it being toasted? That's no fun whatsoever. Also, sorry United, this girl is not giving up her ticket for this overbooked flight. Maybe you should use a plane that has more than like, 40 seats. Anyways, I'm going to be boarding soon yay for marathon flying day (not). Kodiak, here I come baby.