Goodbye Kodiak...for Now

I've only thrown 1 major tantrum in my life. I was 5 years old and so thoroughly enjoying my vacation in Florida that when it was time to go, I lost my mind. My mom didn't know what to do with me because I was a pretty sweet, mellow little child (do not even comment- maybe that's why I'm not so sweet and mellow anymore). Whelp, I got so dang upset that I puked up orange juice all over my aunt's leg before our flight home. Sorry Dee. Anyways, that's how I felt this morning. Obviously, I didn't throw myself to the ground and puke and cry like a barbarian, but I was definitely in a pretty horrible mood. I was all words on my way to Alaska on the float plane, but this time, I was quiet. Ugh, this sucked. As most of you know, my moods change as fast as New England weather, so I got over that pretty quickly. Though I am pretty bummed out that Fuzzy was NOT at the fish ladder this morning, shoulda nabbed him yesterday. ugh. So we got to Kodiak (the town) and my bank account took a serious hit (from buying my family stuff- I know mom dad and Kel I wasn't supposed to, but I did anyways). And I bought myself a bunch of crap. We went to the top of some hill (I know, doesn't sound half as epic when I call it "some hill", but Scott is out cold on the Seattle airport floor and I really don't want to disturb him) and could see EVERYTHING it was an incredible place. Good place for a wedding if you ask me, except for the fog everywhere. But it was gorgeous. We hit up the Kodiak Island Brewery, which I just could not seem to find. Place looked like an old VCR store missing it's signs, definitely not "Brewery" looking from the outside, but the inside was sweet. We also made it over to another fish hatchery and watched them spawn out some king salmon, and I got to hold them and help out a little bit (enough to get blood and iodine all over my pants...that I'm traveling in). So bang Kodiak time is over. The flight to Anchorage is stunning- glaciers and ocean and green beautiful mountains everywhere. I would just fly back and forth over that area all day long. So we land in Anchorage and boom there's a bull moose basically on the runway (5 points for ME!). So the flight that we were just on was interesting. Way back when 2 weeks ago I said I didn't want to get stuck with a chatty cathy next to me... well, Scott and I were the chatty cathys. I pulled out my laptop and played a slideshow of my trip and we were laughing and having a grand time- Scott kept tapping on the guy next to us going "Look at this one!". Dude ordered 2 shots and moved to sit in the back. Whoopsies! The dude in front of us though, he smelled like a french whore. Like literally, I can taste whatever perfume crap he (yes, he) was wearing and I have a cold and it made my throat really dry. So we get into the airport and the Frozen Treats place is right there, but closed. I know, its midnight, but I don't care I want a frozen treat. So now I'm here for the next 8 hours trying to figure out what to do. I was that weird person in the bathroom brushing my teeth. The bathroom walls say "wash your hands to prevent the spread of germs" how about brush your teeth? The way I see it is, I just took extra precautions. So I don't know if I can just sleep on the floor in the airport like Scotts doing it like a pro and I don't think I can. Something about me just ya know conking out on a floor that babies puke on, peoples bearshit shoes (aka Scotts) walk on, and yeah. So some terminal is closing and I'm not moving Alaska Airlines because I am comfortable sitting in my chair and not sleeping here. So EXCITING news if you made it this far... umm I applied for this TV show called "Top Hooker" (um, no I'm not selling my body) it's for the best angler in the country- guys, I made it to the second round of interviews. HOLY CRAP! What do you think, would I be alright for tv? I think it could be thoroughly entertaining. Anyways, not to get too excited but dang I'm just punch happy because I'm tired, and flattered for the chance. Anyways, enjoy the pictures. I'll probably complain about people in the airports tomorrow.

Pretty purple Alaska flowers

View from the top of "Some hill"

Thank you Scott for keeping me alive for 2 weeks in bearland.

gotta love beer.

How I feel about being in airports for the next 24 hours?

Hahahaha- I was like "Scott, get off the ground, people are looking at us, this is society here!"

amazing view.

King salmon- looking like it came out of a horror flick.. kinda just got clubbed in the head.

Kodiak boatyard. No Time Bandit :(

Last Day Already :( noooo!

Last day completely flew by (of course!). We woke up and made everyone a pretty frickin epic (it was pretty foggy out, Scott says) breakfast – eggs, chocolate chip and blueberry pancakes, bacon (“mmmm breakfast,” Scott says,  only have 3 burners so we had to use one on the porch to maximize our food making potential”), venison sausage, homefries, um yeah delicious. Venison sausage is so savagely delicious I could eat it all day. So I’m blogging with Scott next to me so I’ll add in his commentary also- some of my favorite posts solely for the fact that his comments (such as just now: “Oh, I made you those badass earrings”) are either totally out in left field, or do not fit into what I’m writing. Anyways, after breakfast we went (“they were badass come on now”- Scott says about the earrings. Again, totally doesn’t fit into my story) out to Little Kitoi and Scott snagged a beautiful red sockeye salmon! Okay so we were planning on the worst- we brought a bow, a 12 guage shotgun, and a .44 pistol incase the snagging hooks wouldn’t work on the fish. Yes, I was desperate. Scott tried to get a few with the bow, but it didn’t work out for him at all. Then he was trying to hook the fish so hard he almost caught his face with the GIANT snagging hook and I was nervous so I ducked and covered and put my (Scott says, “You can tell them about me almost hooking myself in the goddamn face with that snagging hook, sucker almost -I don’t even know anymore- but it definitely almost almost (yes he said it twice) macked me in the dome. If it didn’t wrap around the pole 6 times, probably woulda got me. Saved by the fishing rod”) lifejacket over my face so I wouldn’t get nabbed in the face with a fist sized treble hook.  But after all that chaos, he got a nice red one. After that we were kind of done fishing (“Poor Carl lost all his fishing tackle, I kind of felt bad, and he didn’t have his drag adjusted real well”- Scott) because yeah Carl had issues and we were sick of catching pink salmon. There was a badass eagle over there though it was chirping and being just plain awesome. So we go over to another fishing spot and there were no fish so we busted out the guns. I shot the shotgun (it was a pump- ummm I LOVE pump shotguns) so I just shot 5 rounds real fast, followed with a “yeahhhh, that was badass” and I also shot the .44 pistol- also amazing. Then I took pictures holding all the weapons, though I have no idea what I’m doing with a bow because the damn thing fell apart when I tried to pick it up to carry down to the boat this morning (“I;m so excited to be able to drive my truck in a couple days”-Scott). After shooting and fishing, Scott gave me some chucks of venison and I put them through the dang meat grinder for 2 hours to make hamburg (RI friends- venison meatballs yeah baby). We had more salmon burgers- I know I have a very horrible obsession- for dinner and drank more homemade beer and bang Alaska trip is over folks. How depressing. Tomorrow we fly out at 10AM and then can adventure in the town of Kodiak for the afternoon (which I’m actually very excited about!) and then the flying marathon continues.

Absolutely beautiful red male sockeye.

Hey pretty birdy

Carl-"Molly, you can't pretend to be a gangster with those damn blue earmuffs on" umm, I see more serious issues here with me "trying to be gangster" than the earmuffs. Maybe the squat? Or dumb face?

Blowing the smoke from the pistol- loved shooting that baby

Trying to be gangster round 2- aka, looking like I'm about to fall/ looking like I have a mental illness

I know I don't look like Zelda the warrior princess, but I definitely felt like her.

This eagle was just bouncing on a log. So awesome.

True bliss. I love the outdoors, I love fishing, I love Alaska. Perfect picture to tie together my whole trip.

Packing fish takes FOREVER

Cleaning fish fillets. See the devil light? My eyes are dead.

Today was a pretty slow day. So I was having sleeping issues here since 1) I need sound to sleep and there are no fans, crickets, or anything of the sort except fighting bears- that will give you nightmares and 2) the pillow I've been using is about as comfortable as a sack of rocks. Anyways, yesterday I whined enough so Scott gave me a fluffy (for Alaska, definitely not Holiday Inn status or anything) pillow and I bought "Crickets" on ITunes aka the sound of crickets chirping in the rain. Put that puppy on last night around 1AM  and slept until 10. Then I started folding some laundry around 11 in my room and was starting to doze off I was like umm whats going on, oh yeah playlist "Crickets" is still on repeat. So today I did Zumba with some of the ladies here it was a blast- got the Latin vibes flowing again (and keeps the teaching fresh). So for the whole hellish afternoon, we cut the fish fillets into pieces and vacuum sealed them. Sounds simple right? Well, if you know anything about bottom fish you probably know why it took so long to go through 80 POUNDS of fillets with the spotlight.

1/2 halibut. Holy fillets. And yes, my eyeballs are a wreck from the light.

All I have to say is, I may have freaked out once or twice, and no worries everyone should still keep eating fish I'm not trying to spook anyone. After that we ate some delicious fish for dinner, I made more salmonberry shortbread cookies (um, porky pig here needs to start running the moment I get off that plane Tuesday) and we watched Boondock Saints- I don't care who you are you have to love that movie. Also, I think that halibut kiss (okay so I motioned like I was going to kiss the halibut for a picture yesterday and a wave hit and it actually happened) gave me a sore throat or something because my throat feels like hell. I better not be getting a headcold before 24 hours of flying on Monday-Tuesday. That.would suckkkk!!!!

EPIC Day

Today was the best of the best. Things I wanted to accomplish when I woke up this morning: see some sea lions and puffins, and go for a walk on the beach. Scott: "As the rain cleared, we actually got to enjoy a nice day" (had to add in commentary from my housemate) ANYWAYS instead of accomplishing just that, we ALSO (well, as in we I mean either me or Scott) found some deer antlers (caugh me)- this is how  it went down- we pull up on the beach and I say "let's have a competition on who can find deer antlers first" Scott is getting the boat together so ya know it doesn't get beached and we don't get stranded and my candyass runs onto the beach (literally runs) and finds 2 antlers right away- "HAHA I FOUND TWO!!"- the only two. Oops. So Scott also caught 2 whales today aka a 68 pound halibut and a 50 pound lingcod- okay not quite whales (he really has caught whales before, more Scott commentary)- btw my computer smells like its gunna catch on fire. Anyways, we saw black rockfish feeding on the surface and I caught a bunch and a quillback thingy BUT I got to play pinyata (how do you spell that?) with a black rockfish and dang that was such a swell time that I videotaped it- okay if you give them head trauma at least they don't suffocate to death, right? It's good times. So we see bunches of puffins and sea lions and whales (which one had smokers lung because it was puffing out BLACK smoke- woah there humpback, chill out on the cigs) and the best was a porpoise with a BABY! Right near the boat. What's more cute than a baby porpoise (except fuzzy wuzzy bear cub- gotta nab him from his mom in 2 days she won't be happy). Oh I dropped Scott's lens cap to his camera under a dock, then was too scared to get it because there were bears everywhere (Scott says we saw fireworks too... totally ahead of what I'm writing, but it happened nonetheless) so I told him I'd pay him $10 to go get it but he's not afraid of bears so he did it anyways. So we got back from fishing and I took pictures with the fish and we filleted them and I did a GREAT job skinning massive halibut fillets and lingcod and then we went to the bunkhouse and had a great dinner and played beer pong (I have no attention span for pool Scott says. True statement). Then we saw fireworks! It was an epic day. Enjoy the pictures! 2 more days oh my can I have another week pleaseeeeeeeeee!?

Fuzzy wuzzy! I'm going to miss you baby :(

Hey, howzit goin?

Cool kelp greenling fish from the deep!

What up quillback?

Fly away puffys! So cute.

Found these on the beach. Showin off my antlers near puffin rock

Hey babe, how you doin?

Gahhh I'm COVERED in fish guts!!!

50 pound lingcod and 68 pound halibut. Boom.

Arnold face. Scotts 2 pigs and my little seabass!

Wooh trying to hoist this beast up.. need a good squat.

Holding the lingcod- thing comes back to life!!! Ok, I was shocked.

Alaskan King Crab- yumma, it's the bestest

3 pounds of king crab... oh my.

Crab leg, halibut scampi, homemade beer, yoga pants. Living the dream.

Guys, that is the MEAT from 1/3 of a leg!!!!

Yes, I'm quoting the "blueberries blueberries" youtube video in my title if you caught that. Pretty slow day today for Alaska, which is fine everyone needs to rest! The air was frigid and it was pouring rain and well I didn't really feel like doing anything outdoors, can you blame me? Did a lot of reading, getting my videos together of all the cool stuff I've done, there are some pretty funny ones. Um, guys, why don't you tell me I'm such a sass. Example: "Scott, you know why you don't catch fish ever? Because you videotape the whole time", next example: "Stop videotaping me- I don't like being videotaped I always look bad (caugh sound like my mom caugh)" The ones I took while whale watching were pretty funny too, I let out this wicked awkward noise when I saw one in the camera I sounded like a combination of a dying rabbit and a chickadee. Attractive, I know. So anyways, we ate Alaskan King Crab for dinner- oh my god the stuff is so damn delicious I could eat it all day everyday. I made halibut scampi to go with it and we got some homemade beer from a guy here and just chilled out and watched movies. Tomorrow we are going to see the sea lions, hiking and trying to find some elk racks (um, if I find one, I'm going to tie it to my head and walk around the woods with it on. You think I'm kidding, noooope) and then try to catch me my stupid halibut, or something at least! Hopefully the weather stays kind of nice tomorrow, it's supposed to rain in the afternoon. If it's as cold as today was, I'll be wearing 4 layers. Long johns in August? Boy oh boy, okay summer you can grace me with your presence any time now.

Hello Dolly, Goodbye Sockeye

"Woah I've got a big one! Oh, just a tree" (yeah, that one)

So I give up on the whole red sockeye idea (maybe)- Scott and I head over to Little Kitoi Bay and bang there they are. So we bring this gnarly HUGE snagging hook (aka treble hook that's about the size of a fist- domination- yes, it's legal and yes, it's cruel, but I want that damn red sockeye). So I get that snagging hook in the water and start ripping it through the schools of fish. I snagged one sockeye, two sockeye, five sockeye. Issue- all were females and not pretty and I was so MAD! And I felt bad. Okay I'm a fish biologist here and I don't mind brutally murdering fish if I'm going to eat them or if they are for science or whatever, but snagging the belly of a ripe female fish and watching her unborn (I know, fish aren't born but whatever) eggs just blasting all over the place as the pressure of the hook ripped her skin open made me feel a little bad. A little. I was still determined to get my big male sockeye (I know, I'm a total bitch). So I get the snagging hook in again and start tearing it even harder. I blasted that thing through the water so hard that it almost flew out and caught me and Scott. So I decided I was getting too angry and gave Scott a try, which he also failed. Meanwhile, during this snagging dilemma there are two bears at the nearby fish ladder SCREAMING at eachother for 45 minutes. No big deal right? Wrong. So this fish ladder is also the pathway that Scott and I have to walk on to get over to the lake where we were going trout fishing.

Hello little pretty Dolly you are so dang adorable

So I've got a bad bad feeling about this because I know how angry people are. When I'm angry, I don't care who is around me or what they are saying or anything, I just need to yell and let it out. Then I'm good. So, in my mind, these angry bears wouldn't care if we yelled at them to go away because they were just angry and didn't care. Guess what? I was right. So I'm like all nervous walking through this area. It's like the "lair of the bear" combined with the forests in Lord of the Rings and Jurassic Park. Place is littered in bear poop and smells like straight hell. Worst smelling place ever. So we make it around the fish ladder to the boat, bear free. But, by the time we are at the boat, I'm freaking because I know there are 2 pissed off bears around and I haven't seen them yet, so I don't know where they are. "Scott, can I do anything to help you get that boat in the water?" "Umm nah you're fine", "Well hurry up I'm frickin nervous". Boat gets stuck on its way in the water, and I'm panicking. Finally, after what feels like forever, the boat slides into the water, Scott jumps in, I jump in, I just push us from shore. We are about 7 feet into the water and this bear comes RIPPING around the corner, right where I was standing 10 seconds earlier and just stares at us. I decide to try this yelling at the bears this "HEY BEAR, GET OUTTA HERE" thing just locks eyes with me and stares me down. Shittt. Scott tells it to go away, doesn't listen. Thing walks right to where the boat was and just stands there, staring us both down. Um, yeah, scary scary time. So we make it out of that area and shoot over to where a stream meets the lake. Bang, one after another little Dolly Varden.

Me catching us dinner...again.

I also caught a nice rainbow trout (bringing back the home front!) we ate for dinner- delicious. So aside from the adorable Dolly Varden (which, I was like "aww this is the cutest thing I've ever seen!" when I caught one, then started singing "The Joker"... you're the cutest thing I ever did see, I really love your peaches wanna shake your trees.... hooked a tree right then and there) I caught a rainbow, 2 trees, 8 sticks, a stump, and (get this skill) a rock WITHOUT loosing my spinner. If that isn't amazing, I don't know what is. Oh, and I got trapped in the front of the boat, my boot got stuck in the angle and I fell like 3 times trying to get up and Scott and I were laughing so hard I just stayed there because well duh couldn't get up! So we get back and grumpy pants bear is still there, milling around the fish ladder.

What actually happens when I hold fish...

Scott and I managed to sneak by through the jungle (I was videotaping the whole thing- I sound like a woman about to give birth with the way I was breathing) and get back to the boat safely without any mishaps with the grouch. Thank god he chilled out.

These rocks are everywhere! So cool and beautiful.

We ate rainbow trout and venison and salmon burgers (I am so addicted to the things) for dinner- um how am I going to survive once school starts without all of this delicious fresh food? Good thing I froze a LOT of salmon. Tomorrow we have Alaskan king crab for dinner... hell yes.

Closest To A Heart Attack Yet

The scariest thing so far happened to me last night. So I’m lying in bed, not sleeping, because I ate sugar before bed and I’m wired and just need to go run around or something but I’ve decided to try to let myself get some sleep so I can wake up before 10AM (um, fail). So it’s around 1AM and I’m listening to the bears epically battling and it’s actually putting me to sleep because I need to hear sound when I sleep and the soothing noises of bears gouging eachothers eyes out seems to be working. So you know when you’re almost asleep? Like, your mind starts drifting into sleep land, your body relaxes, and you are about to be in a coma in 3 seconds? Okay I’m right there, laying on my back, about to fall asleep. Suddenly, I hear what sounds like gunshots RIGHT outside my window. My body went up 2 feet off my bed in the horizontal position and I fell on the floor like a flopping fish. And the shots keep going I feel like I'm in Vietnam or something getting fired at but the windows aren't breaking or anything so I should be okay and I then hear “yeee hoooo!” okay I’m living on a rock in the middle of nowhere and there are no crazy people here so who are you crazy hillbillies shooting the bears at like 1AM? Anyways, it ended up being some of the fishermen lighting off fireworks and shooting flares because they must have caught a lot of fish, or were just nuts. Scared the hell outta me, and the bears too, didn't hear them again. On a bright note, I think I wasted so much energy with my flop and fall that I slept like a baby after that, well after locking my door and windows.

72 Seine Boats in One Bay? Um, Woah.

This boat caught a LOT of fish.

So it’s 11:15PM here (on Tuesday still) but the internet here is so slow its basically nonexistent so I’ll just post this in the morning. So another day flew by! Seriously time, slow it down! So my estimate of about 15 boats being here for the purse seine fishery opener was off by only 57- yes, there were 72 BOATS packed into this small bay. So I head down around 11:45 in the morning because the fishing starts at noon and I’m just like woah. So many boats packed into such a small space. Mind you, these boats have to make big circles in the water with their nets to catch fish. So the humor started before the fishing did. The assistant manager here got to do the deed of lighting the flare to indicate that the fishing could start: so as the flare goes off, this poor cute dirty old husky with different colored eyes that lives here gets so spooked she just eats shit and falls over this net. Hilarious. Then the flare goes a little low and hits this pine tree and starts smoking. Luckily it went out, but it looked like a forest fire was about to start for a minute. So the boats got rolling, as did the radio commentary. My favorite thing I heard today “Hey man, can you just pick which frickin side you’re going to, because there are 3 other boats trying to get in here”, Guy driving asshole boat, “Um, you talking to me? I think you’ve got the wrong boat I’m not doing anything”, Mad guy, “Unless there’s another (forgot the name) chugging around in this water, you’re the indecisive asshole so howzabout you pick a frickin side or I’m going to drive over your net” Asshole guy: Silence

Only a few boats of the many!

. I watched people make a circle around another boat that had already made their circle and started hauling fish- it took them about 40 minutes to get out of the larger set that was around them. I would have been pissed if I was the little boat! The coolest part of this whole thing was that the Alaska State Troopers were flying over in a float plane and dang I just felt so cool because I watch that tv show and I got to see them in action- not that they actually did anything interesting, just drove a plane around, but whatever still cool. So on top of the crazy fishing, it was pouring here today like seriously downpour all day. Soo I made some soup and listened to the angry fishermen over the radio and then made apple crisp.

There were a bunch around the corner too.

Scott made these delicious salmon burgers oh my jeez I need to make them with the copious amounts of salmon I’m bringing home I could eat them everyday. Another funny thing today: so I’m trying to get Scott used to real life (aka fake life) so I tell him: YOLO means “You Only Live Once” (which I only learned a few weeks ago) so when people say YOLO now you’ll know what it means. So you’ll probably hear that a few times back home. Scott: That’d be alright. Me: What the heck kind of response is that? Haha typical Molly- Scott conversation.

Don't tip over!

Another “Scott, is this mug dirty?” (I’m trying to load the dishwasher here so we can watch Planes, Trains, and Automobiles- yes I know, best movie ever), “Well, I used it this morning but I rinsed it, but I used it yesterday… starts another word” Me: “Scott, I’m going to make your life a lot easier. This is a “yes” or “no” question. There’s no need to find the gray area. I’m a woman, if I’m not asking for more description, it’s your lucky day and just say yes or no”. I swear he doesn’t hate me yet, but these are great life lessons. And purely entertaining for the both of us (or me at least because as we all know, I’m a bully). We also scored some free homemade beer tonight woot woot. I’m getting a lot better at fly earrings, and I found out I’m allergic to some weirdo prairie pheasant (the one with the beak attached) guess I won’t be touching those suckers anymore!

One Week Down in Alaska- Um Can I Rewind a Few Days so I can Stay Longer?

Another coho- are we really surprised at this point?

So one week down in Alaska. Time flies when you’re having fun! So things I’ve done: caught a million salmon, seen a million bears (and gotten MUCH braver with them), caught a lingcod and a few rockfish, seen a bunch of whales and porpoises, learned how to tie fishing flies, made delicious sweet treats out of Alaskan fruits, watched a purse seine boat haul up 173,000 pounds of salmon, and watched a bear almost run someone over, quite hilarious. Things I still need to do: Shoot Scott’s sweet guns, he has like oh 10? Something like that. Catch a halibut- enough said.  Catch a Dolly Varden- hopefully that will happen this afternoon! See all the sea lions and sea otters- the sea lion home is 7 miles away in the ocean and its 7 ft seas for the next few days- I wouldn’t be caught dead out there in a 22 ft boat (or close to that!).  Not a whole lot left to accomplish, so hopefully I’ll get everything done! So today the commercial purse seine fishery opens right here, in Kitoi Bay, at noon. Scott showed me a picture from “a few years ago”( Scott: Molly, come in the office I’ll show you a pic of the fishery from a few years ago. Me: Okay, WOW that’s a lot of boats- wait Scott, this picture is from 1985. Scott: Eh, yeah a few years ago whatever.)

Weapon of choice everytime.

I can hear these fishermen over the radio already talking to eachother and I know this is going to be an entertaining afternoon. If you don’t know what purse seining is, it’s basically when the fishermen use two boats to make a big circle around the fish, then they pull net up and unload all the fish. Can we see a problem with this? Try 15 groups of fishermen doing this at once. I'm guessing a whole lot of "HEY ASSHOLE YOUR ON MY SET! HEY I WAS GOING TO GO THAT WAY!" I am going to sit on the dock with the radio (because they swear at eachother over the radio) with maybe a beer or two and just laugh for the rest of the day. Better than live baseball, or football probably. Scott said a few years ago (aka 1985 probably) someone overfilled their boat so much that it sank. Dang I hope that happens, I know I'm horrible, but it would be so hilarious. Yelling, swearing, and sinking boats. 10000 times better than Nascar (I hate Nascar anyways). So diversion, as usual. Scott’s phone rings all the time, but people from other houses can pick it up. This time someone just said “hello phonecall” here- um am I supposed to answer this? I don’t think I am… so I’m not going to… but I feel awkward just ignoring the phone when someone just said “hello, phonecall”. Whatever. Yesterday Scott taught me how to make more cool earrings, I’m up to 5 pairs of awesomeness. I also made delicious cookies out of salmonberries. We caught a few more salmon, only kept 1 coho for dinner. So here’s something I have learned: you know why female and male sockeye salmon turn red for spawning? Because they are little demons, the seeds of Lucifer himself. The little devils will follow your lure literally to the boat then look at you and go “haha betcha thought you were gunna catch me, noooooopppe”. I want to catch one so bad.

Salmonberry shortbread cookies. Delicious.

Literally an hour yesterday “OH OH ones following my lure ohhh they are so pretty I just want to catch ohhhh he’s going to bite arghhhhhhh!!!! He swam away AGAIN!”Stupidass sockeye salmon. I just want one red one they are so so gorgeous. I’m about ready to just jump on top of the fish school and hope that the impact of me bellyflopping on a red sockeye will explode its brain and it will die so I can get a picture with it. Fat chance, I know.

Life changing discovery: coffee in a mason jar (apparently  travel mugs are nonexistant in Scott's house) + salmon + bears= awesome.

(8/13/2012) The Art of Tieing Fly- earrings.

Peacock earrings! So pretty!

Last night, Scott made the serious mistake of showing me how to tie a fishing fly. Now as we know, I’d be better at flying than fly fishing, so there is no reason for me to learn how to tie fishing flys if I can’t get the dang line in the water without tangling it in a knot on my head consisting of line, hooks, my hair, and any nearby trees. However, the BEAUTIFUL truth of the matter is you can make hella nice earrings for yourself out of fishing materials. So poor Scott has all of his fancy fly tying bird feathers and raccoon hair and all kinds of stuff and this girl just ripped through it like a 4 year old in a candy store. So I’ve made two pairs of earrings so far, and Scott made me one wicked sweet pair out of peacock feathers. So I wanted to be a peacock 2 Halloweens ago really bad because I saw this awesome peacock costume and thought dangg that’s cool but Ryan really wanted to be bacon and eggs and him and all of our friends thought it was a fabulous idea so bang dropped 50 bucks on a damn bacon and egg costume we go to the Halloween dance and stupid bloody clowns win the costume contest… um come on people bacon and eggs is so much cooler than stupid bloody clowns. Anyways, I wish I bought that peacock costume because I have sweet earrings to match it, and apparently bacon and eggs didn’t mix so well so who the hell wants to be a stupid fried egg for Halloween with no bacon slice? Not me!

I'm not a model so I know I look like a goof. But these earrings are cool!

So anyways this earring fly tying thing is pretty addicting. Issue: Scott can make a pair in 10 minutes; Molly can make a pair in 2 hours because she is the most indecisive person on earth, and a total perfectionist (issue when dealing with feathers). Other issue: whatever animals (there’s a full out bird beak hanging off some of these feathers- I bet you thought this quail was alive… nope, it’s dead, it actually could have been taxidermized by Chuck Testa) are hiding under those pretty colors are making my face itch. And eyeballs. And nose. And everything. So, I know I’m allergic to possibly one of the following: squirrels, raccoons, crows, chickens, partridge, quail, pheasant, or rabbits. Nevermind all the other crapola that I have no idea what it is- all I know is I’m gunna have a whole zoo hanging off my ears by the time I leave Alaska. Oh, peacock too derr. So after I’m having an allergic reaction to one of the fluorescent dyed animal things, I decide to take pictures of the earrings on my face. Fail, round 2. There is no way to get my face at an angle while taking a picture of myself with both earrings. I know, sounds easy. Maybe I’m not thinking straight because I’ve sniffed some botulism off of a raccoon ass while making earrings, or maybe I’m just dumb. Anyways, I got a whole lotta face and hair and a little earring.

Blue pretty featheryness.

On a side note, Pantene, can’t you just hire me for a hair commercial? My hair is shining up a storm from your shampoo.  Going to try to catch some salmon tonight and get away from the fur/feather station for a little while so my face doesn’t blow up like a hot air balloon. The commercial salmon season opens here tomorrow soo I’ve gotta catch my limit before all those fishermen swipe ‘em up! So some other quick stuff before I go fishing: so I pissed and moaned about catching stupid rockfish because they were not halibut but let me tell you, they were frickin delicious and I need to catch more of the stupid things because they tasted better than halibut. Another funny fact- Scott and I had no crackers, so we traded with the other people here for crutons. I just find it hilarious that people actually wanted crutons! Like who wants to munch on some crutons in trade for delicious Ritz crackers? Pretty awesome, actually. Also, I opened the window here. I haven’t gone outside yet today because (its only 3 here mind you) I’ve been consumed and earrings and Insanity, but it’s COLD out there! And the fact that a Christmas song came on my ipod and my brain said “Yes, it’s cold out, seems like the time around Christmas, go ahead and listen to “I’m Dreaming of A White Christmas” in AUGUST is NOT okay. Next adventure (before Christmas J ?) hopefully some kind of tropical island so my body can reset itself into summer mode because I seriously wouldn’t be surprised if it snowed here tonight.